Trick or Treat????

Why are all those little humans dressed up so funny and why are they knocking on Mom’s door?

Don’t you remember last year at this time?  The little humans dress up funny and then go around to houses and say, “Trick or Treat.”

Then what happens?

Then the big humans give them candy.

Hey, why can’t we do the same thing?

What do you mean?

We could go to the houses and maybe the big humans would give us treats, too!  We could have a real feast with all sorts of treats.

Mom won’t let us go out of the back yard.

Oh, right.  Is Mom around now?

Why?

I want a treat.

Where Are the Leaves???



I’m so happy that Mom has been raking leaves.

I bet she’s not happy.

Well, she should be.  She’s getting exercise and fresh air.

Somehow I still don’t think that makes her happy to be raking leaves.  Why do you feel that way?

Think about it.  Mom’s been home the last three weekends and she’s been raking.

So….

So, she’s been home with us and that always makes her happy. Besides, when she’s out raking leaves we get to be outside watching.

That’s true.  She always lets us go outside when she’s out there working.

Yes.  We’ve had lots of play time outside lately and it’s been really nice.

Still, I think Mom gets tired doing all that raking.

Maybe, but she’s still getting fresh air and sunshine………that is when it isn’t cloudy.

You might be right.  Besides, the fact that she’s spending her weekends at home with us is always good ‘cuz then we get brushed and petted and we get treats more often.

I have an idea.  Let’s ask the humans to bring their leaves over to Mom’s yard so she can rake them.  That way she’ll get even more exercise and fresh air, we’ll get to spend more time outside, and she’ll be spending more time at home with us.

I get the feeling Mom’s not going to think that’s such a great idea………..

Curiosity

Hemingway, what are you doing?

I’m exploring.

You’re going to get in trouble.

No I won’t.  Nobody knows I’m here.

Mom was explaining one of those human phrases to me the other day and it fits this situation.

What are you talking about?

Remember hearing humans say, “Curiosity killed the cat.”?

Yes, and I don’t like that phrase.

Neither do I but now I understand it much better.

What happened?

The other night Uncle Bob was looking at the ice maker in the freezer.  He had his head in there so I figured I would try to help.

Oh, I’m sure he loved that!

He didn’t know I was even there.  I was looking in down at the very bottom of the freezer.  I thought Mom might have hidden some treats in there.

Did you find any?

No, I didn’t have time to search thoroughly ‘cuz suddenly he shut the door.

Did he see you first?

No, he didn’t see me and he shut the door on my head.  It really scared me and I started to panic.

Was Mom there?

Yes, and she was trying to get me to calm me down but I was too scared so I just ran away.

You should have let Mom pick you up and take care of you.

I know, but my head hurt and I didn’t want it to happen again so I just ran as fast as I could and hid.  I could hear Mom calling for me but I wanted to be alone.  Finally, when Mom was in her room I came out from under the bed and she started talking to me and petting me.  She checked my head and asked me if I had any owies.  She was really concerned and I hated to scare her like that.

So…………..what’s the purpose of this tale?

I didn’t get my tail shut in the door……….oh, you meant the other kind of tale, hahahahaha.

Goofball.

Well, I was curious about what was in the freezer and as a result I almost got my head smashed really hard.  So now I know what humans mean when they say, “Curiosity killed the cat.”

Are you going to stop being curious?

Probably not….it’s in my nature.  But I’m going to try to be more careful.  That’s why I was trying to warn you to be careful when you go exploring.

Ok, thanks for the warning.  You’re a pretty good little brother after all.

Fur, Feathers and Frost

Are feathers warmer than fur?

Why?

Well, Mom said it’s getting colder outside and I wonder if our fur is enough to keep us warm.

So what made you think about feathers?

I see birds flying around out there and they don’t have fur.  They only have feathers.

So?

If we asked Mom to make us some coats of feathers then we could play outside longer when it gets colder.

What makes you think that?

You’re not listening to me.  I told you that the birds are out there even when it’s really cold.  I’ve seen them.  If they can stay warm with only feathers and we can’t stay warm with just fur, then if we had feather coats we would be warm.

You’re not getting enough exercise, are you?

Why?

You keep coming up with silly ideas.

I don’t think it’s silly.  I’m going to see if Mom wants to market my idea.  We’ll become rich and famous and I’ll have my picture taken wearing my feather coat.

Mom has her hands full with you!

Mom’s Mad

Better stay away from Mom today.

Don’t worry.  I’m keeping my distance.

I just wanted to see what was on the other side of the gate so I managed to squeeze through but Mom was out there instantly.

I was hiding when she came out ‘cuz I knew she wasn’t going to be happy with you.

She picked me up and brought me inside and shut the door.  She told me I had lost my “outdoor privileges”.

What’s a privilege?

I’m not sure but it must have something to do with outside and now I’m stuck on the inside.

I knew Mom wasn’t having a good day ‘cuz I heard her grumbling at the trees and leaves.

She’s been doing lots of raking lately.

She really hates those stupid big paper bags she has to use for the leaves.  I hear her complaining about those lots!!!

She’s even been yelling at the trees ‘cuz when they let go of their leaves they’re too stupid to make the leaves fall into the bag so she doesn’t have to rake them.

She doesn’t really think trees would do that, does she?

She’s a human.  Who knows what she thinks.

Well, I’m going to just be my adorable self so she doesn’t get mad at me.

I’m just going to sit here and hope I get my privileges back…….whatever they are!

Trauma

Hemingway, you’ve been awfully quiet this week.

So have you.

Well, I’ve been concerned about you. 

That’s nice, thanks!

What happened to you Monday night?  I saw Mom go out of the house with you and then you both got in her car and left.

Mom took me to the doctor’s house.

Did you have to get a shot?  Last time I went there I had to get a shot but I was real good and didn’t squirm or meow.

No, I didn’t get a shot.

So why did Mom take you there?  Did you just want to meet the doctor man?

Not really!  Mom took me there ‘cuz she found a lump on my shoulder and she was concerned.

Mom really takes good care of us.

She sure does, but I was kind of scared ‘cuz it was raining outside and I got wet and that made me mad.

We never go out in the rain so it must have been serious.

Mom was worried so she wanted the doctor man to see what it was.  Turns out it was a tick.

What’s a tick?

It’s an ugly little bug that attaches itself to fur people and humans.  Mom hates them and now I do, too.  I probably got it when I was crawling under the deck one time.  Anyway, the doctor man got it off of me and told Mom that I was going to be fine.

That’s a relief!

The doctor man said that we kitties don’t usually get ticks ‘cuz we do so much grooming.  However, this stupid little tick attached himself on my shoulder and I couldn’t reach him.

Hey……we better start checking each other for ticks.  That way we won’t have to worry Mom about us.

Good idea.  She has enough things to worry about.  Did you notice all those leaves on the ground outside?  That’s why she was outside so long last night.  She was trying to get those leaves into bags.

I like playing in bags but not if there are leaves in them.

I’m only going to go outside if there are no ticks!!!

Hair

Mom got her hair cut the other day.

It’s really short now.  In fact it’s almost as short as our hair.

Sometimes I try grooming her hair when she’s trying to sleep.

Does she like that?

Not really, but I’m just trying to help.  I figure if I groom her hair during the night then she won’t have to get up as early in the morning ‘cuz it won’t take her as long to get ready for work.

You’re older than me.  Have you ever had to have your hair cut?

Nope.

I wonder if kitties ever do have to get haircuts.

I’m not going to let anyone cut my hair.  It’s shiny and black and then I have those really white patches that stand out so beautifully.  It’s too pretty to cut.

Well, nobody’s going to cut my hair.  I have an orange masterpiece on my body and of course my tail is the envy of absolutely everyone.

You are so hung up on that tail of yours.

It’s special.

I heard some dogs have to get haircuts all the time.

See, that just proves it.  We kitties are superior ‘cuz we don’t need all that extra stuff done to us.  We’re beautiful just like we are.

More Thoughts About Fall….

I think the humans got too hot and they turned on all of their fans on high-speed and opened the windows.

Is that why it’s so windy outside today?

I think so.

I didn’t like the wind ‘cuz it messed up the fur on my tail.  You know I don’t like a messy tail.

Wasn’t it fun chasing all the leaves, though?  I was running all over the yard chasing those leaves.

The glue that held those leaves on all summer must have really dried up ‘cuz there’s a gazillion leaves on the ground.

You don’t even know what a gazillion is.

I heard a human use it once and I think it means lots and lots and lots.

Did you see Mom trying to get some of those leaves into those big brown bags?

Why can’t we have a big brown bag to play in?

I thought about jumping into one of the bags with the leaves but I didn’t think Mom wanted me doing that.

Why was she picking up the leaves anyway?

I think she was trying to help Ebony.  Did you notice that the steps off the deck were completely covered in leaves?  Ebony wouldn’t have known where to walk and she’s old and has enough trouble as it is.  I try to help her when I can.

It’s really hard to stay on the ground when the wind is blowing so hard.  It’s a good thing you and I are really big cats!  If we didn’t weigh this much maybe we would be flying through the air like those birds.

That would be fun, but I think landing would hurt.  If this wind keeps up, maybe we should go inside and eat so we don’t get too light.

Race you!

Confused Again

Remember a few weeks back when we got confused?

Aren’t we always getting confused?

Maybe you…..but I am on top of things!

You sure are….on top of the desk, on top of the computer shelf, on top of the couch….

Enough already!

So, go ahead and tell the humans why we’re confused now.

Well, a few weeks back it got really cold (at least to us) and we were wondering if a bunch of humans left their refrigerator doors open.

I remember that!

Now we’re thinking that maybe a bunch of humans turned their ovens on and left the oven doors open ‘cuz it’s really warm outside.

I like it when it’s warm!

So do I and I know Mom does too.  However, she said it’s not normal for it to be this warm.  Usually there’s what she calls frost, about now.

What’s that?

I’m not real sure.  I know there’s frosting on cake so maybe it just means that there are lots of cakes outside or something.

YUM!!!  That sounds wonderful to me!!!

Well of course it does.  Any food sounds wonderful to you!

So?  I’m just a growing kitty.

Anyway, we came up with a great idea!  Mom hates the cold winters.  So, if all the humans will turn on their ovens and open the doors, maybe we can keep it warm outside and we won’t have all that snow and ice.

Sounds like a great plan to me.

Besides, we like to play outside and I don’t think we’re going to like snow and ice!  Are you humans ready to help?