Humans Just Confuse Me

Why is Mom getting another job?

What?

I think she’s getting another job.  Have you been eating too much food and she can’t afford it with just one job?

What on earth are you talking about?

I heard Mom say that she’s selling garages this weekend.  I wonder if she’s selling the garage here and I wonder if Uncle Bob knows.

Shakespeare, you can twist things around so much.

Well, explain it to me then.

Mom said she’s putting stuff in a garage sale that a friend is having.

So her friend is selling garages?

Nobody is selling garages.  A garage sale is where humans put stuff for sale they no longer want or need.  They usually put low prices on things so they can get rid of stuff.  I think most of them sell things at garage sales so they will have room for more stuff.

Mom isn’t putting any of our toys in this garage sale thing, is she?

No.  She knows we still play with our toys.

Is that a sticker I see on your tail?

Oh no!!!  Get it off!  It must have attached itself to my tail when I was walking around on the bed where Mom has stuff spread out for pricing.

Maybe I should leave it on.  It says one dollar and I’m sure Mom could buy some treats for me with that dollar.

Shakespeare, be nice or I might put a fifty cent sticker on your tail.

Well, that sure isn’t nice.  I don’t want anything stuck on my tail so I’m sorry I said that.  Come over here and I’ll get that sticker off.

Thank you.

I wonder if I’ll ever really understand what humans are doing.

Probably not.  I don’t think they even understand!