Living With Humans 101

We thought we would let our readers know what we’ve learned about living with humans.

This is going to be fun!

Food

I love food and Mom knows it.  I figure the best thing to do is to race out into the kitchen whenever anyone is there because the humans are sure to think I’m cute and they’ll give me food.

I have another tactic.  I pretend to try to cover my food dish.  Mom thinks I don’t like my food so sometimes she’ll give me something else.  What she doesn’t know is that I’m just trying to hide it so Shakespeare doesn’t get it.

Sleeping

I try to get into my cutest position so Mom will forget all the times I woke her up at night.

By the way, this doesn’t always work so I have to figure out another method.

I have a sure-fire method.  I quietly go into Mom’s room when she’s sleeping and I gently get up onto the pillow by her head.  Then when she wakes up and feels my furry body there, I kiss (lick) her hand and she tells me how precious I am.

She does not!

Yes she does!  One thing you need to learn is that it’s not good to jump on Mom when she’s sleeping.  You’re a big kitty and sometimes you hurt her, but you always surprise her.

But she tells me I’m cute when I’m sleeping.  However, I may try your method ‘cuz it sounds pretty good.

Outside

I try to race outside as fast as I can when Mom opens the door.  Of course she’s caught onto that and now she looks to see where I am.

I have a better method.  When I want to go outside I start knocking things down.  I’ll look right at Mom and knock pens off the desk, papers off the shelves, anything that I can move is in danger.  Mom gets frustrated so she always lets me outside.

Mom’s going to be reading this and now she’s going to know what you’re doing.

Shoot.  I forgot that!  Well, we are very good when we’re outside.  Both of us keep coming back in the house to say hi to Mom and let her know we’re ok.  By doing that we are guaranteed of more outside time.

Playing

Whenever Mom gets us a new toy we play with it like crazy so she’ll think we really like it.

That way we’re sure to get more toys ‘cuz Mom figures she made us so happy.

Well, these are just a few of the things we’ve learned in our short lives so far.  We’ll probably learn even more as we get older.  Maybe some of you readers out there can teach us other things to help us live better with humans.

Maybe we can go on tour and give lectures and make money and buy treats.

How do you always do that?

What?

Bring food into every single blog!!!!

Hey, this time it’s not my fault ‘cuz it was already one of the lessons.  I just brought it up now ‘cuz I was dreaming about those wonderful treats.