Hemingway, why does a stupid groundhog get to have a whole day? I can easily look outside and see that winter is going to be around for many more weeks. I think we need to have a Steinbeck day. We could have fish tacos and catnip cake. I know all the humans would love that.

Well, I think we should have a Hemingway Day………and I’m not talking about that writer human who had cats with six toes. I think we need to celebrate me. Just look how regal I am. For my day, I want that salmon mouse stuff and tuna water martinis.

How can a fish be a mouse? I think you’re all confused. Did too many snowflakes hit you in the head when you were outside?