Ladies and gentlemen. I want you to meet someone. I am here to introduce you to Mr. Cranky Pants.
What are you talking about Hemingway? And what are those funny letters on my orange furs?
Let me tell you what Mr. Cranky Pants did last night. When Mom got home from that work place, she opened the door so we could go outside. She also put food in our dishes so then we had a dilemma. Go outside or eat? I think Mr. Cranky Pants was more interested in going outside, so of course I headed for the food dish.
After supper, when Mom let us both back in the house and closed the door, something happened.
You know what. You went all crazy whacko on us!!! You were hissing and spitting and growling and carrying on like an idiot. I decided to stay away from you, especially after you actually screamed at me! Mom just stood and stared at you and so did I.
Maybe I got a bad batch of nip.
There’s no excuse for being Mr. Cranky Pants. Mom didn’t know if she even wanted you sleeping in her room last night, but you finally calmed down.
Maybe I had a bad dream.
You were wide awake.
Well, then it must have been my evil twin!
Well, see to it that you don’t let your evil twin come around here again.