Who Had a Shower????

Did Mom tell you where she went this afternoon?

Weren’t you listening?  She said she was going to a baby shower.

I must have been sleeping.  What’s a baby shower, anyway?  Do they just all get together to watch a dirty baby get a shower?  Hey….maybe they did it because it rained today.  They could just take the baby outside in the rain shower.  Still, I don’t think that would be much fun.

Shakespeare, you’ve got to learn to pay attention.  Mom went to a party for our former and current doctor.  They’re going to have a baby.

Our doctors
Our doctors

Hey….that’s the doctor man who actually held me and then clipped my nails.  I sure told him what I thought about that!  I don’t remember the doctor lady.  I must have seen her when I was really little.

Yes, you were very young and just as much of a problem!

So....let me get this straight....
So….let me get this straight….

Our two doctors are going to have a baby?  Are they going to have a baby kitten?

Good grief......
Good grief……

Do I have to teach you EVERYTHING????  They’re going to have a baby human.  They even told everyone that it’s going to be a little boy.

So who had a shower?  Did Mom get wet?

Goofball, when they say it’s a baby shower they mean they are having a party and giving gifts to the mommy-to-be.   Don’t you remember how we helped Mom wrap those gifts?

I do vaguely remember helping her with the bag and the crinkly paper.

Here’s a picture of the doctor lady opening one of our gifts and look how happy she is with the little hangers.  I wonder if we left any of our fur on the paper or in the bag.  I hope Mom let her know those gifts were from us, too.

Michelle and Baby Hangers

We did a good job with the gifts, didn’t we?  I still don’t understand why they called it a shower.  It doesn’t look like anyone got wet.

Shakespeare, take that catnip out of your ears and listen.  It was a party with gifts.

You said it was a shower!

I’m going to go take a nap.


ConversationWhat’s wrong Shakespeare?

I don’t feel like playing.


I’m worried about Mom.


Uncle Bob said Mom lost her marbles and I don’t know where to look for them.  By the way, what are marbles?  Do you know where they might be?

Shakespeare, it’s a good thing I look stuff up on the internet while you’re napping.  That’s just another one of those crazy human sayings.  It just means that Mom’s brother thinks that Mom’s gone off the deep end.

She’s going to drown!!!!!!!

Let me rephrase that.  It means Mom is doing something a little crazy.

Does it have to do with that big tree stump outside?

Remember the storm we had earlier this month?  Well, along Mom’s walk there were lots of trees and stumps and branches piled up because they got scared of the wind and hail and they fell down.  Then the humans put them in piles.


Mom kept looking at this one tree stump and she told Uncle Bob that there was something about it that she found really fascinating.  One night this week she talked him into driving over there with her to see if they could pick it up and bring it home.

We’ve already got that big stump from when our tree had a heart attack and died.

I know, but Mom wanted this one.  Uncle Bob must have thought it was kind of interesting too, ‘cuz he did pick it up and helped her bring it home.

So what’s Mom doing with that noisy machine now?

She said she’s sanding the stump down so it will be nice and smooth.  Then she’s going to put something on it to keep it from falling apart outside.   She claims it’s going to be really pretty when she gets it all smooth and shiny.  I stopped listening when she said it wasn’t a new scratching post for us.

Well, I hope she finds her marbles when she finishes with the stump.  Let’s show the readers what she’s working on.

This is what the stump looked like when she first got it home:

Tree Stump Before

Before She’s been working with that noisy machine trying to make it smooth so this is the first stage:

Sanding Started

First Stage of SandingWouldn’t it be fun to run along that long arm and jump into a bed of catnip?


God....why did you make humans so hard to understand?
God….why did you make humans so hard to understand?

We sometimes have trouble understanding what Mom is talking about.

If she would just speak the language of food, I know Shakespeare would understand her all the time!

The other day she looked at us and said we crack her up.

One time when we were running too fast in the house we made the lamp fall down…

I think the lamp jumped ‘cuz it was scared of us!

…anyway, it cracked and Mom said it wasn’t any good.

If we crack her up, does that mean she isn’t any good?

She also loves to call us goofballs.

We aren’t balls…..we’re kitties.

We don’t even know what a goof is.

Maybe it’s some kind of food.  Look….there’s two o’s in the middle of goof and there’s two o’s in the middle of food so it must be the same!

Shakespeare, the readers are going to think all you do is eat.  Come to think of it, your face is in the food dish an awful lot!

Maybe…..but the doctor man doesn’t tell me I have to lose some weight like he tells you.

Hush!  Back to understanding Mom.  Sometimes she tells us we’re going to summer camp.  We have no idea where this camp is and we’ve never seen Mom pack any of our toys in one of those box things to get us ready.  What’s even more strange is that she seems to threaten us with that when we’re being super naughty.

Does that mean that camp is a bad thing?

See….we just don’t understand Mom all the time.

God...do you think our readers can help us....or do they have just as much trouble with their humans?
God…do you think our readers can help us….or do they have just as much trouble with their humans?

The only time we always understand Mom is when she mentions TREATS!!!


Hemingway, what are those letters up there?

That means “Thank Goodness It’s Almost Friday”.

Oh, I like that!!!  Friday means that the weekend is coming and Mom will be home and we can go out and play.

Humans seem to like to make words smaller by just using letters.  Maybe we could come up with some for the kitty world.

Great idea!  Let’s put our kitty brains together and see what we can come up with.

FUTS could mean Feed Us Treats Now

STINS could mean So Tired I Need Sleep

ORD could mean Open Refrigerator Door

COMM could mean Catnip On My Mind

RATH could mean Race Around The House

SABITY could mean Squirrels and Bunnies In The Yard

I think we’ve got a great start on our Kitty Dictionary of Key Phrases.  Maybe our Fur Friends will have even more.

I like the first one.  FUTS!!!!

Today’s Thoughts

I know what today is.


It’s SUNday!  Look outside….the sun is shining.

As usual, I’m a little confused about what humans have done to their language.


Well, what would happen if the sun wasn’t shining today?  Would they call it CLOUDday instead?  What happens if we have sunshine on the other days of the week?  For instance, if we have sun on Monday would they have to change the name?  If we have rain on Thursday would they call it Rainday instead?

I don’t know.  I never thought about that.

On top of that, take a look at the names of the days of the week.  What’s a Mon?  What’s a Thurs?  Do humans have to fry their foods on FRIday?  The human language just doesn’t make sense!  Our cat language is much easier to understand.

You’re right.  I just thought it was neat that the sun is shining on SUNday.

I guess you’ve got the right idea.  We should be happy for the little things.  Let’s go find Mom and tell her we should all go outside and play.

I bet I can get to Mom first.

The race is on!