Hemingway was naughty!
Shakespeare, you are such a tattletale or is that tattletail?
Well, you were naughty and here’s proof! Not only is he getting into the plant, but if you look at his fur you’ll see all sorts of dirt and bits of leaves on it. He was rolling in the dirt and now his shiny black fur is all dirty!
Shakespeare, get away from the computer. Mom told me I have this assignment and it doesn’t involve you.
That’s because I wasn’t naughty!
Dear human and fur people readers, Mom told me I’m in “Time Out” and I have an assignment to write something about what it means to be naughty. I didn’t think I was that bad, but Mom got kind of frustrated with me this morning. If I ever want treats again, I have to write this “catsay”…..that’s the kitty version of a human essay. So, here goes….
ON BEING NAUGHTY
I don’t know what gets into me at times. I think the problem is that I’m a kitty who loves attention and I’m also a stubborn kitty. If Mom had really been paying attention, she would have seen that when she first picked me up at the Animal Humane Society. I didn’t want to go into the carrying box. I wanted to ride free in the car so I could see where I was going. But I guess I’m going back too far. Mom always tells me not to jump up on her desk. I don’t understand why she doesn’t want me up there. I can see for miles and miles when I’m up there and it’s just kind of a neat place with all sorts of interesting papers, pencils and books. I’m working on learning to stay off the desk but sometimes I still forget. Then there’s the plants. I just have to explore them. They are so pretty and I love to smell the flowers. I also love catnip. Here’s another instance where I was naughty. Mom was bringing in groceries from her car last night and she left the gate open a little. I figured she wanted me to go out and get my own catnip since she was busy. She told me I should learn to wait and she would get me some catnip when she had time. Wait???? I don’t understand that! Now we have arrived at this morning when I was evidently so bad that I needed what Mom called a “Time Out”. At first I thought she meant I was going to spend some time outside. That’s all I wanted anyway. When she didn’t let me out, I had to start knocking things off the entertainment center to get her attention. I also had to jump up in front of the monitor when she was using “our” computer. After I knocked a few more things down on the floor, Mom said it was enough and that’s why I’m sitting here writing about being naughty. Mom said I should learn something but I don’t know how much I’ve learned. I think the problem lies with the humans. They just don’t understand that kitties don’t like waiting for things and when they get something in their heads, there’s nothing humans can do. However, if I want to go outside I suppose I should say that I learned that I shouldn’t be knocking things down, chasing my little brother, jumping on the desk, or sitting in front of the monitor.
Hemingway, are you about done?
Mom, is that good enough? Can I go outside now?